[ale] Microsoft joke (fwd)

[Nick Lucent]

On Tue, 25 May 1999, Matthew Brown wrote:

> Yeah, then they could write a standard for application developers to use to
> communicate with the BSOD and give it a catchy code name or acronym (like
> M$CrapDAC.)   Ohhhh, and then they could change it every 9 months and not
> tell anyone 'til afterwards.

Charge you $90 for an upgrade.

Nick

> 
> This may be the one technology that can't be ported to Linux!
> 
> ----- Original Message -----
> From: Jim Lynch <jwl at sgi.com>
> To: Jim Kinney <jkinney at teller.physics.emory.edu>
> Cc: Atlanta Linux Enthusiasts <ale at ale.org>
> Sent: Monday, May 24, 1999 5:06 PM
> Subject: Re: [ale] Microsoft joke (fwd)
> 
> 
> >Geez, I'd think they could make a mint selling ads to fill up the page.
> >Especially if they could sense what caused it and/or what application
> >was running.  Say WordPerfect was running, then an ad could read:
> >
> >IF YOU"D BEEN RUNNING WORD, THIS WOULDN'T HAVE HAPPENED!
> >
> >8)
> >Jim.
> >
> >Jim Kinney wrote:
> >>
> >> I found this cynically ammusing...
> >>
> >> James Kinney M.S.Physics                jkinney at teller.physics.emory.edu
> >> Educational Technology Specialist       404-727-4734
> >> Department of Physics Emory University  http://teller.physics.emory.edu
> >>
> >> Microsoft Announces Improved BSOD
> >>
> >> In a surprise announcement today, Microsoft President Steve Ballmer
> >> revealed that the Redmond based company will allow computer resellers
> >> and end-users to customize the appearance of the Blue Screen of Death
> >> (abbreviated BSOD), the screen that displays when the Windows
> >> operating system crashes.
> >>
> >> The move comes as the result of numerous focus groups and customer
> >> surveys done by Microsoft. Thousands of Microsoft customers were
> >> asked, "What do you spend the most time doing on your computer?" A
> >> surprising number of respondents said, "Staring at a Blue Screen of
> >> Death". At 54 percent, it was the top answer, beating the second place
> >> answer "Downloading Pornography" by an easy 12 points.
> >>
> >> "We immediately recognized this as a great opportunity for ourselves,
> >> our channel partners, and especially our customers." explained the
> >> excited Ballmer to a room full of reporters.
> >>
> >> Immense video displays were used to show images of the new
> >> customizable BSOD screen side-by-side with the older static
> >> version. Users can select from a collection of "BSOD Themes", allowing
> >> them to instead have a Mauve Screen of Death or even a Paisley Screen
> >> of Death. Graphics and multimedia content can now be incorporated into
> >> the screen, making the BSOD the perfect conduit for delivering product
> >> information and entertainment to Windows users.
> >>
> >> The Blue Screen of Death is by far the most recognized feature of the
> >> Windows (tm) operating system, and as a result, Microsoft has
> >> historically insisted on total control over its look-and-feel. This
> >> recent departure from that policy reflects Microsoft's recognition of
> >> the Windows desktop itself as the "ultimate information portal." By
> >> default, the new BSOD will be configured to show a random selection of
> >> Microsoft product information whenever the system crashes. Microsoft
> >> channel partners can negotiate with Microsoft for the right to
> >> customize the BSOD on systems they ship.
> >>
> >> Major computer resellers such as Compaq, Gateway, and Dell are already
> >> lining up for premier placement on the new and improved BSOD.
> >>
> >> Balmer concluded by getting a dig in against the Open Source
> >> community.  "This just goes to show that Microsoft continues to
> >> innovate at a much faster pace than open source. I have yet to see any
> >> evidence that Linux or OpenBSD even have a BSOD, let alone a
> >> customizable one."
> 

I love California, I practically grew up in Pheonix
                -- Vice President Dan Quayle