[ale] [OT] Googlian Calendar

Jim Kinney jim.kinney at gmail.com
Fri Sep 27 13:39:46 EDT 2013


I much prefer a truly momentous occasion in human history to mark a new
calendar epoch, The year of the first moon landing should be Year 0. The
start of the year should be either the aphelion or perihelion point.

Go then for a 12 month calendar of 30 days each plus 5 international
holidays separating the 4 quarters, first and last day of the year plus one
between each of the other three. On leap year, we get an extra holiday at
the opposite helial event.

Also there should be free beer on all those international holidays. For the
people who live where alcohol is illegal, you will have an incentive to
move someplace better.


On Fri, Sep 27, 2013 at 1:20 PM, Sid Lane <jakes.dad at gmail.com> wrote:

> being in an interfaith marriage my frighteningly precocious daughter
> recently asked me why we have two New Years as well as how we can go from
> the year 2013 in January to 5774 a couple of weeks ago which got me to
> thinking that Google’s 15th birthday today seems like the perfect
> opportunity to separate that most deeply rooted of all church/state
> violations: the Gregorian Calendar! what does that have to do with Google?
> glad you asked! let me answer in three parts:
>
> 1. any calendar requires an epoch (this is self-evident)
> 2. most (if not all) alternatives’ epochs are tied to respective
> religion’s creation stories (still violating separation just in different
> flavors)
> 3. name a more secularly significant event than google launching*
>
> think about it - how often do you wonder: “how did the world work before
> Google?” when Googling obscure error messages or edge case symptoms we
> often quip at work: “isn’t it weird to think there was a time when you used
> to have to actually KNOW stuff?”. the fact that “Googling”, the present
> tense of the verb “to Google”, is recognized by spell check (at least mine)
> just underscores my point (though admittedly I’ve yet to see a full
> conjugation)! honestly, I am convinced that Google is the new library of
> Alexandria and when they eventually crash it will plunge humanity into
> another dark age though that’s a topic for another time…
>
> anyway, in conclusion I encourage everyone to write your congress critter
> (enclosing the obligatory campaign contribution - another topic for another
> time), MP, Ayatollah (well, maybe not him), etc to petition that September
> 27, 2013 be internationally recognized as 15.000, the 0th day of the 15th**
> year A.G. (Anno Googli). at a minimum I hope we can get formal adoption
> from the Pastafarians…
>
> Happy New Year!
>
> *which can be identified with any precision - I’m not keen on a Kelvin
> calendar based on a big bang SWAG, not to mention the relativistic effects
> get really nasty as you approach absolute zero (though an argument can be
> made that does seem appropriate given what quantum mechanics does
> approaching 0K temp).
>
> **unlike Pope Gregory Googlers are smart enough to realize that days and
> years should start with ZERO instead of one! not to mention that we don’t
> even need a B.G.! we just go negative - September 26, 1998 becomes -1.364
> (though this admittedly requires signed variables). we can figure out the
> subdivisions (“months”, “weeks”, etc) later but it seems like an
> opportunity to standardize & bring sanity while we’re at it!
>
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-- 
-- 
James P. Kinney III
*
*Every time you stop a school, you will have to build a jail. What you gain
at one end you lose at the other. It's like feeding a dog on his own tail.
It won't fatten the dog.
- Speech 11/23/1900 Mark Twain
*
http://heretothereideas.blogspot.com/
*
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