[ale] Humor: Windows98 Source Code

smnoldelinux at mediaone.net smnoldelinux at mediaone.net
Fri Oct 22 17:19:46 EDT 1999


/* Source Code to Windows 98 */
   #include "win31.h"
   #include "win95.h"
   #include "evenmore.h"
   #include "oldstuff.h"
   #include "billrulz.h"
   #include "monopoly.h"
   #define INSTALL = HARD
   char make_prog_look_big[1600000];
   void main()
   {
     while(!CRASHED)
       {
       display_copyright_message();
       display_bill_rules_message();
       do_nothing_loop();
       if (first_time_installation)
         {
         make_50_megabyte_swapfile();
         do_nothing_loop();
         totally_screw_up_HPFS_file_system();
         search_and_destroy_the_rest_of_OS/2();
         disable_Netscape();
         disable_RealPlayer();
         disable_Corel_Products();
         hang_system();
         }
       write_something(anything);
       display_copyright_message();
       do_nothing_loop();
       do_some_stuff();
       if (still_not_crashed)
         {
         display_copyright_message();
         do_nothing_loop();
         basically_run_windows_3.1();
         do_nothing_loop();
         do_nothing_loop();
         }
       }
    if (detect_cache())
      disable_cache();
    if (fast_cpu())
      {
      set_wait_states(lots);
      set_mouse(speed, very_slow);
      set_mouse(action, jumpy);
      set_mouse(reaction, sometimes);
      }
    /* printf("Welcome to Windows 3.11"); */
    /* printf("Welcome to Windows 95"); */
    printf("Welcome to Windows 98");
    if (system_ok())
      crash(to_dos_prompt)
    else
      system_memory = open("a:\swp0001.swp", O_CREATE);
    while(something)
      {
      sleep(5);
      get_user_input();
      sleep(5);
      act_on_user_input();
      sleep(5);
      }
    create_general_protection_fault();
 }






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