[ale] Microsoft joke (fwd)

[Matthew Brown]

Yeah, then they could write a standard for application developers to use to
communicate with the BSOD and give it a catchy code name or acronym (like
M$CrapDAC.)   Ohhhh, and then they could change it every 9 months and not
tell anyone 'til afterwards.

This may be the one technology that can't be ported to Linux!

----- Original Message -----
 From: Jim Lynch <jwl at sgi.com>
To: Jim Kinney <jkinney at teller.physics.emory.edu>
Cc: Atlanta Linux Enthusiasts <ale at ale.org>
Sent: Monday, May 24, 1999 5:06 PM
Subject: Re: [ale] Microsoft joke (fwd)


>Geez, I'd think they could make a mint selling ads to fill up the page.
>Especially if they could sense what caused it and/or what application
>was running.  Say WordPerfect was running, then an ad could read:
>
>IF YOU"D BEEN RUNNING WORD, THIS WOULDN'T HAVE HAPPENED!
>
>8)
>Jim.
>
>Jim Kinney wrote:
>>
>> I found this cynically ammusing...
>>
>> James Kinney M.S.Physics                jkinney at teller.physics.emory.edu
>> Educational Technology Specialist       404-727-4734
>> Department of Physics Emory University  http://teller.physics.emory.edu
>>
>> Microsoft Announces Improved BSOD
>>
>> In a surprise announcement today, Microsoft President Steve Ballmer
>> revealed that the Redmond based company will allow computer resellers
>> and end-users to customize the appearance of the Blue Screen of Death
>> (abbreviated BSOD), the screen that displays when the Windows
>> operating system crashes.
>>
>> The move comes as the result of numerous focus groups and customer
>> surveys done by Microsoft. Thousands of Microsoft customers were
>> asked, "What do you spend the most time doing on your computer?" A
>> surprising number of respondents said, "Staring at a Blue Screen of
>> Death". At 54 percent, it was the top answer, beating the second place
>> answer "Downloading Pornography" by an easy 12 points.
>>
>> "We immediately recognized this as a great opportunity for ourselves,
>> our channel partners, and especially our customers." explained the
>> excited Ballmer to a room full of reporters.
>>
>> Immense video displays were used to show images of the new
>> customizable BSOD screen side-by-side with the older static
>> version. Users can select from a collection of "BSOD Themes", allowing
>> them to instead have a Mauve Screen of Death or even a Paisley Screen
>> of Death. Graphics and multimedia content can now be incorporated into
>> the screen, making the BSOD the perfect conduit for delivering product
>> information and entertainment to Windows users.
>>
>> The Blue Screen of Death is by far the most recognized feature of the
>> Windows (tm) operating system, and as a result, Microsoft has
>> historically insisted on total control over its look-and-feel. This
>> recent departure from that policy reflects Microsoft's recognition of
>> the Windows desktop itself as the "ultimate information portal." By
>> default, the new BSOD will be configured to show a random selection of
>> Microsoft product information whenever the system crashes. Microsoft
>> channel partners can negotiate with Microsoft for the right to
>> customize the BSOD on systems they ship.
>>
>> Major computer resellers such as Compaq, Gateway, and Dell are already
>> lining up for premier placement on the new and improved BSOD.
>>
>> Balmer concluded by getting a dig in against the Open Source
>> community.  "This just goes to show that Microsoft continues to
>> innovate at a much faster pace than open source. I have yet to see any
>> evidence that Linux or OpenBSD even have a BSOD, let alone a
>> customizable one."