[ale] Microsoft joke (fwd)

[Nick Lucent]

On Mon, 24 May 1999, Jim Lynch wrote:

> Geez, I'd think they could make a mint selling ads to fill up the page. 
> Especially if they could sense what caused it and/or what application
> was running.  Say WordPerfect was running, then an ad could read:
> 
> IF YOU"D BEEN RUNNING WORD, THIS WOULDN'T HAVE HAPPENED!  

It would just lock up rather then blue screen =)

Nick
> 
> 8)
> Jim.
> 
> Jim Kinney wrote:
> > 
> > I found this cynically ammusing...
> > 
> > James Kinney M.S.Physics                jkinney at teller.physics.emory.edu
> > Educational Technology Specialist       404-727-4734
> > Department of Physics Emory University  http://teller.physics.emory.edu
> > 
> > Microsoft Announces Improved BSOD
> > 
> > In a surprise announcement today, Microsoft President Steve Ballmer
> > revealed that the Redmond based company will allow computer resellers
> > and end-users to customize the appearance of the Blue Screen of Death
> > (abbreviated BSOD), the screen that displays when the Windows
> > operating system crashes.
> > 
> > The move comes as the result of numerous focus groups and customer
> > surveys done by Microsoft. Thousands of Microsoft customers were
> > asked, "What do you spend the most time doing on your computer?" A
> > surprising number of respondents said, "Staring at a Blue Screen of
> > Death". At 54 percent, it was the top answer, beating the second place
> > answer "Downloading Pornography" by an easy 12 points.
> > 
> > "We immediately recognized this as a great opportunity for ourselves,
> > our channel partners, and especially our customers." explained the
> > excited Ballmer to a room full of reporters.
> > 
> > Immense video displays were used to show images of the new
> > customizable BSOD screen side-by-side with the older static
> > version. Users can select from a collection of "BSOD Themes", allowing
> > them to instead have a Mauve Screen of Death or even a Paisley Screen
> > of Death. Graphics and multimedia content can now be incorporated into
> > the screen, making the BSOD the perfect conduit for delivering product
> > information and entertainment to Windows users.
> > 
> > The Blue Screen of Death is by far the most recognized feature of the
> > Windows (tm) operating system, and as a result, Microsoft has
> > historically insisted on total control over its look-and-feel. This
> > recent departure from that policy reflects Microsoft's recognition of
> > the Windows desktop itself as the "ultimate information portal." By
> > default, the new BSOD will be configured to show a random selection of
> > Microsoft product information whenever the system crashes. Microsoft
> > channel partners can negotiate with Microsoft for the right to
> > customize the BSOD on systems they ship.
> > 
> > Major computer resellers such as Compaq, Gateway, and Dell are already
> > lining up for premier placement on the new and improved BSOD.
> > 
> > Balmer concluded by getting a dig in against the Open Source
> > community.  "This just goes to show that Microsoft continues to
> > innovate at a much faster pace than open source. I have yet to see any
> > evidence that Linux or OpenBSD even have a BSOD, let alone a
> > customizable one."
> 

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